A conversation today between me and Ashley Glover, my erstwhile correspondent from Down Under:
DATER: Ashley, how you holdin’ up mate? What’s the latest on the virus in Australia? Family good? Oh, and thanks Aussies, for giving America’s favorite movie star, Tom Hanks, the virus there!
That wasn’t too neighborly of you, mate!
GLOVER: Hey Boss!
Well, the virus is causing havoc. The cases themselves, aren’t really upping. It’s the panic buying that has many families, including my own, screwed.
I haven’t been able to buy sugar, flour, pasta, frozen or canned goods, meat, nappies, wipes or toilet paper for FOUR days.
DATER: Wait…what? I take it you live in a place with a smaller population than your average place?
GLOVER: I live in a semi-rural place where we have only one main supermarket. Now they want to shut our schools, but we have yet been given a date. We have next to no food and the so-called stimulus package is 3 weeks away.
DATER: That’s…BS mate. But I can see that. I grew up in a small town in New Hampshire, and I can only imagine what it’s like there. We had one general store, for miles around. Listen mate (and I’ll stop with the ‘mate’ stuff here but I like sayin’ mate!’)…we’ll get through this right? I mean, right?
GLOVER: Yea, we’ll get through it. I just wish people had common sense, and left stuff for people who really need it most.
DATER: No food at the supermarket is no big deal to you Aussies though, right? Can’t you go out and skin some snakes and fire them up on the barbie if need be?